A growth toward becoming like Christ
God’s greatest blessings often come wrapped in the paradox of divine distress—those unique circumstances that, though deeply challenging, become the very ground where agape-love is cultivated within us. These trials and tribulations are in fact opportunities of profound spiritual growth. They provide us with the inescapable chance to love our enemies, to rise above instinct and pride, and to embody a love that is not of this world but of God Himself.
The process by which agape-love is birthed within us is what the Scriptures term “SonPlacing”—the divine intention and plan that God has for every believer. This love, however, is not kindled amid laughter, comfort, or abundance. Like all births, it comes forth from travail, pain, and endurance. The apostle Paul, in his famous discourse on love in 1 Corinthians 13, describes this love as enduring and patient. He writes that love “does not seek after the things which are its own, is not irritated, provoked, exasperated, aroused to anger, does not take into account the evil which it suffers” (1 Corinthians 13:5, Wuest). This passage paints a picture of love that is not reactive, but proactive—a love that transcends circumstances and personal offense.
At the heart of agape-love is forgiveness. The maturation of this divine love is triggered by the experience of being sinned against. If you desire to possess this love, the only appropriate response to hurt or injustice is forgiveness, no matter the situation or depth of the wound.
In Scripture, the words translated as “forgive” and “forgiveness” come from four distinct Greek terms, each rich with meaning. Collectively, they convey the ideas of “sending forth,” “sending away,” “bestowing favor unconditionally,” and “releasing.” Forgiveness, in this sense, is not merely letting go of a grudge or forgetting an offense. It is an absolute annulment of transgression and its consequences, akin to a debt that is not just paid but completely canceled and erased from all records.
Letting Go
This radical form of forgiveness requires that both the failure and any thoughts of retaliation are forever released, as if thrown into a supernal incinerator—never to be retrieved or remembered. Forgiveness, then, is not just about letting go of what was done to us, but also about creating a new reality, one in which the offense is as though it never occurred.
As the psalmist writes, “Blessed is the man unto whom the LORD imputeth not iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no guile.” This is the heart of forgiveness: an act so complete and transformative that it rewrites the narrative of our souls.
A Liberating Experience
Forgiveness, fundamentally, is not a human invention but a divine act. It originates in the heart of God and is extended to us through the atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ. When we accept this sacrifice, we experience an unconditional release from the penalties our fallen, carnal nature has accrued. The apostle Paul reminds us, “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God.” Yet God’s forgiveness is not merely a legal pardon—it is a personal, liberating experience that the church has long called “Salvation.” As we turn our lives toward God, our infractions are erased, and we become spiritually washed, free, and invigorated with new life and energy.
This forgiveness is, at its core, the ultimate gift of love. When we receive forgiveness from God, the seed of divine love—agape—is sown into our hearts. Jesus illustrated this truth in his parable when he asked, “Tell me therefore, which of them will love him most?” Simon answered, “I suppose that he, to whom he forgave most.” To receive great forgiveness is to be moved to great love. This initial blossoming of love is what Scripture calls phileo-love—a joyful, grateful affection that springs from having received something wonderful and undeserved. It is, however, only the embryonic stage of agape-love, which is deeper, more self-giving, and unconditional.
Jesus further clarifies this process: “Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much: but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little.” This passage reveals that the depth of our capacity for love is directly linked to our experience of forgiveness. Forgiveness received from God for the “good” in our lives produces phileo-love, an affectionate and responsive love. But the journey does not end there. To mature into agape-love, we must extend forgiveness from ourselves, especially in response to the “evil” or wrongdoing we endure from others.
To Love as God Loves
This is the critical transition point in the development of divine love within us. To love as God loves, we must move from being recipients of forgiveness to being dispensers of it. It is not enough to bask in the joy of being forgiven; we must also become agents of forgiveness. This is perhaps the greatest challenge and highest calling of the Christian life. It demands that we forgive those who have hurt us deeply, those who have betrayed or wronged us, just as God has forgiven us. In doing so, we participate in the life of God Himself, becoming channels through which His agape-love flows into the world.
Practically speaking, this transformative process often unfolds in the midst of our greatest struggles and heartaches. The “battlefields” of life—those moments of conflict, disappointment, and loss—are not merely obstacles to be overcome but are opportunities for the birth of something holy within us. When we choose to forgive, to let go of resentment and to release both the offense and the offender into God’s hands, we are shaped into the likeness of Christ.
Our capacity for agape-love expands, and we come to embody the very love that once saved us. In summary, the journey toward agape-love is a path marked by both receiving and giving forgiveness. It is a process initiated by God’s mercy and sustained by our willingness to forgive others as we have been forgiven.
Each circumstance of divine distress becomes a sacred invitation to practice this love, to transcend our natural inclinations, and to participate in the very heart of God. Ultimately, it is through forgiveness—the letting go, the creation of a new reality, and the refusal to keep score—that agape-love is born, matures, and overflows from our lives, blessing not only ourselves but all those around us. [A summary of a portion of Garrison Russell’s book SonPlacing found here: https://sonplace.com/xulon/sonplacing/sp_chp15.htm ]